I felt guilty for being exhausted by my kids. I realized that makes me a good dad.
In an excerpt from "The Tired Dad," Jon Gustin says good parents need rest and shouldn't confuse exhaustion with failure.
Jon Gustin is the author of "The Tired Dad."Courtesy of Joaquin RodriguezJon Gustin is a writer, podcast host, and content creator known for his candid takes on modern fatherhood and burnout."The Tired Dad" offers a relatable portrait of modern fatherhood, blending humor with insight into the realities of raising kids today.
This is an adapted excerpt from his book, out now.I'm exhausted by my children who constantly need my full attention. My full attention watching a monster truck do the same flip 20 times over a cardboard box.
My full attention watching the 15th cartwheel or the third puppet show in the last five minutes. I'm exhausted by these children who need me to get them another snack because they didn't like the first one. Who need me to help them burn off energy so they'll finally fall asleep.
Who need me to sit beside them through a bedtime routine they're fighting because of nightmares.When my daughter was 5 years old, she asked me to have a tea party with her. I was running around trying to get some work done on a deadline, so I told her I didn't have time.
I can still see the disappointed look on her face.Time with kids is fleetingSome days, I feel like I'm hitting the mark of what it means to be a good dad. Other days, like that tea party day, not so much.
These moments of parenthood are undeniably fleeting. There are days when I look at my kids and think about how many times I was busy and missed the little things.Sometimes I enter a mental spiral of everything I've done wrong, and feel the guilt crushing me.
When my daughter asked me to join her tea party, should I have stopped what I was doing, called off work, and joined in? Of course, the answer depends on so many things — if I'm under a deadline at work, if she can wait until later that day, if this is the first tea party I've said no to this week or the 10th.When I finally take a break, I feel guilty, like I'm selfish for not having infinite reserves of patience and energy.
But the guilt dissipa
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